The Mindful Homeschool

May I be at peace.

May my heart remain open.

May I awaken to the light of my own nature.

May I be healed.

May I be a source of healing for all beings.

– Buddhist Tradition

“This is my best day of my life!”

Said frequently by my 4 1/2 year old son.  At first when I heard him say this, I would respond with a smile and a laugh.  Now when he says it, I respond, “This is the best day of my life, too!”  I love this age! 

1)  Watched the hilarious parts of “The Money Pit” starring Shelley Long and Tom Hanks.  Tried to skip over the more adult scenes and foul language as best as we could.  The kids watched certain scenes over and over; they were so funny.

2)  Watched “The Princess Bride” and enjoyed the sword fighting.  (The kids have been pretending to sword fight outside with sticks and paint stirrers).

3)  Learned about the game of soccer while watching my 8 year old son play.  Also learned that May 16 is too soon to put away the winter clothing for the season.  (I wore long underwear, a winter jacket, and covered my kids and myself in blankets while we sat on the sidelines and cheered on the soccer team today.  I was still really cold!)

4)  Learned how to shut off the gas line downstairs while watching their father and the service technicians.  We had a stove range installed recently and it needed to be hooked up.  The kids also watched the plumbers fix a leaking “ABS” pipe downstairs in our laundry room and install a new kitchen faucet.

5)  Spent time at the hospital visiting my dear husband who was diagnosed with a blood clot.  They brought him a backpack (8 year old son loaned his) filled with snacks, magazines, a Harry Potter book, a deck of cards, and a recently charged ipod shuffle.  Saw an emergency helipad up close.  (Is that the right word for a helicopter landing pad?)

6)  Finished reading the Four Story Mistake by Elizabeth Enright.  Love that book!!!

7)  Celebrated their cousins’ First Eucharist, two weekends in a row!

8)  Picked rhubarb and ate it while dipping it in a small bowl of sugar.  (Just like Mommy did when she was a kid!)

9)  Flew a kite outside at a nearby park.  (This kite was bought about a year ago at Costco and my 8 year old son has been begging to fly it).  Hubby put it together this morning;  it is an awesome looking NASA Discovery Shuttle design. 

10)  Set up the boys’ Japanese dolls and Japanese “helmet for display” in honor of Boys’ Day, May 5.  We were a bit late setting this up.  We took the gifts out of their boxes on Monday, May 11.  My 8 year old had been wanting to see these dolls for years and I never found the time to display them.  So we saw them in their full glory for the first time in 8 years.  The dolls, which are of the Japanese Emperor and Empress in their traditional dress, were a gift to my 8 year old son from my Japanese friends.  The dolls were given to him when he was a baby and I never took them out of their wrapping until this week!  They are very beautiful and the boys (and my daughter) love looking at them and admiring them.  The Japanese traditional helmet was a gift to my second born son.

We just finished reading the Four Story Mistake by Elizabeth Enright together.  It had been our read-aloud for the last month or so.  It is a wonderfully written book about a family who moves out to the country to live in an old house.  There are four children in the story who each have their own way of adapting to their new surroundings.  It has been a great book for us to read right now because we also are considering moving out of our house in the “city” into an old house in the “country”.  I hope to read the author’s other books to the kids in the coming weeks. 

I will protect myself from people who take more than they give.

I will surround myself with loving, giving people.

I think the internet is one amazing tool for those of us who like to communicate with others via the written word.  As a matter of fact, most of my homeschooling support comes from people on the internet.  I think the internet has brought about a second Renaissance and we homeschoolers are on the cutting edge of it all.  Without the internet, I would feel much more isolated and feel much less inspired in my homeschooling and mothering.  I gain so much knowledge here and feel like I have cyber-friends now.  Weird, eh?  And yet, I figure that there must be a lot of people out there like me.  People who want to connect with others who share similar interests and values.

But here is the thing.  Even though I share an awful lot about my life and my children (no names, of course) and my struggles, I am a very private person.  I have not told many people in real life or online about my blog cause I am a fairly private person.  My blog is like a very private diary that anyone in the world with access to a computer can read and yet … I don’t want just anyone reading it.  Certainly not all of my neighbors or all of my in-laws!  Ya know what I mean?  This is a private public diary of my life.  And yes, it is weird that I want to keep it private from some individuals, I guess. But Facebook is a lot like that too.  The people I do want to see reading my blog are other moms, friends, homeschoolers, yoga practioners, etc.  I don’t know if that makes sense to anyone but me but there you have it.  This is the reason why I don’t post more often.  I just don’t know who is sitting across the table from me in front of their laptop looking into my world.  I guess I am just weird that way.

Anyone else feel that way?  Or know what I mean?  Maybe I am just afraid that if I put it all out there, I will be judged.  And yet some of my favorite bloggers are the ones who lay it all out for everyone to see.  I love their courage and their willingness to share it all with the world. 

My four year old asked his father on Wednesday afternoon to take off the training wheels on his bike.   Right away he was riding like a pro.  It was amazing.  (My now 8 year old son was the same way; he also learned right away at age 4 and was riding great the very day we removed his training wheels).  Now my 4 (and a half) year old loves to ride his bike up and down the street.  He can look around, he can go fast, he can turn, he can skid to a stop, he can do the Ed Bagley (sp?) bike dismount from the Living with Ed show, and he can even do tricks (like put his feet up on the frame, something we don’t encourage).  It is truly amazing and I cannot believe how easy he makes it all look.  My daughter and I did not learn as quickly.  We both were cautious and needed time and experience on the bike before we felt confident riding.  My little guy just needs someone to hold the bike while he gets his feet in place - and then he is off!  He learned how to do all of this on Earth Day, a great day.  It was a great way to celebrate loving our planet.

I hurt my back about a month ago.  I was sitting on the living room floor playing cards with my 4 yo son and when I stood up, I hurt something.  Later that night I could not sit comfortably and I was in a lot of pain.  When I lay down for sleep that night, it was with fear of more pain and very little mobility.  Fast forward to today.  It still hurts.  It has gotten much better.  The intensity of the pain went away after about a couple of days.  But I felt that I needed to get it checked out by a doctor just to rule out any other issues and to help me with my recovery.  The doctor told me that I have a musculoskeletal injury and he recommended physical therapy.

So I am thinking about trying a session of physical therapy.  Maybe just one time.  I am curious what they will teach me and curious about what PTs do.  But I am also borrowing a DVD from the libary that I just love.  Or rather I love the teacher, Peggy Cappy.  Her DVD, Yoga for the Rest of Us: Back Care Basics has inspired me to start my own home practice again.  I have even thought about setting the alarm and getting up and doing yoga way before the kids wake up.  I know!   I am so inspired by her.  She is inspirational and she has dedicated her life to yoga and helping other people.  Her yoga is full of hope and positive energy and I feel that if I practice with her on a daily basis, I will not only heal but strengthen my back so I do not injure it again. 

I even bought a beautiful new Eco Conscious GAIAM mat at Target last night to celebrate my re-birth, if you will.  Can you tell I am excited?  Maybe I will even be able to drop those 10 lbs. or so that I gained over the winter, possibly from skipping out on my regular yoga classes. 

Namaste.

Things are a-changing around here.  We have been looking at moving to another house and neighborhood.  The time is right to move.  Interest rates are low and the houses that were not affordable to us years ago have come down considerably in price.  So … it is a no-brainer, right?  That, combined with the fact that the neighborhood scene has gone sour for us makes this a great time for us to move.  And we really could use more space, indoors and outdoors. 

But here is the dilemna: getting our house ready for sale.  We had a realtor (and her assistant!) visit our home last week.  She came to meet us and talk about our options and also give us tips on what to do before we list our house.   Oh my!  It was mortifying.  She looked in all our rooms and closets and tried, I think, to offer us advice in a gentle way.  Ummm.  It was hard.  I needed a few hours afterward to unwind.  She said that I had the patience of a saint when she saw the kid’s bedroom.  I guess it looked, uh, not so great.  She told us that people nowadays don’t look at houses and see the potential.  They want to move into a house that looks like something out of the Pottery Barn.  Okay….

So … we were told to replace our old kitchen appliances (easy), replace our light fixtures (okay), re-carpet, replace our tub, replace our old windows, paint, and DECLUTTER.  That was the embarassing part.  I don’t know when was the last time someone looked at our entire house, every room and closet.  Maybe when we moved in 12 years ago?  It was MORTIFYING!!!  When we have people over to visit we use the unused rooms as a way to store all of the extra clutter.  We could not even hide our clutter in the closets because she looked in them.  Well, not all of them.  But my dear husband offered to show her our walk-in bedroom closet.  Ugggh.

It was embarrassing for me to have two women I don’t know come into my house, my bedroom even, and look at the decorating (or lack thereof) and our piles of books and papers.  Double ugggh.  Well, we did make it through the event and I am wiser because of it.  And humbled.  It does feel good to clear out our house and I am looking forward to making our home even more lovely.  I just wish that current buyers understood all the charm that goes into a house complete with a back yard that looks like something out of Mrs. Piggle Wiggle.   Don’t your kids dig holes in your backyards?

I am not sure where this will lead us and maybe we will end up staying here.  There are many reasons to stay put.  But if we can find a house that would make for a better home, sayonara baby!   

As a parent you are given about 2 decades to teach your kids what you want them to learn.  Not just things like math and spelling.  Things like the importance of family, the importance of taking care of your body/health, the importance of play, the importance of living out your values, and being a good person.

Childhood is something you will never get back.  (Getting weepy here.)  I have heard that many veteran HSers regret that they did not take this time to enjoy being with their kids and wished that they had played with them more.  Instead they spent their time trying to fulfill some other person’s schedule and expectations.  I want my children to be life long learners and not feel that learning starts and stops with a clock, a school building,  a schedule, or a textbook.

I hope I don’t sound too preachy.  I certainly have more questions than answers and I am FULL of self-doubt MOST OF THE TIME!  If  my kids are “behind” anyone then they are probably ”ahead” in some areas too.  Like knowing who their parents are and spending hours of quality time with them.  Like learning how to live with siblings.  Learning how to catch a garter snake and carry it without fear.  LOL.  You name it.  And they are probably ahead in academic areas that PS’d kids would not be tested on.  Did you know what a mortgage was when you were in 2nd grade?  Did they teach you that in grade school?  Did they teach you how to compost?  Or any of the other strange and wonderful things that our HS’d kids are exposed to on a regular basis?  And when was the last time you heard a PS kid say they aced the exam on how to keep their 4 yo brother happy and content while mom was busy working on a project? 

Finally, I think of a quote I once read.  All learning is self-taught learning.  Not sure if I agree with it completely but it does make me think.  I often try to remember how I learned the things I did learn and why.  Which teachers were good teachers and which teachers I did not like and why.  I think a lot of what I learned was because I loved the subject or the project.  And I was blessed with some very good teachers, people who were caring and dedicated and passionate about their subject. 

I am constantly thinking about how to get my children to learn more.  And I spend a lot of time wondering if I am doing a good enough job.  If nothing else, we HSers are courageous.  It takes guts and faith to do this work.  It is NOT for the faint hearted.  We won’t know how well we have done the job until years from now!!!  But I do see glimmers.  My kids enjoy books and reading.  They love nature and are gentle hearted (most of the time!)  They don’t think of the library as “that place with the computer games”!  And they don’t think that school is the only place where you can get an education.   

I have lots of weaknesses.  Who doesn’t?  I sometimes wonder if they (and I) would be better off if they were in a traditional school setting.  I did have a near meltdown earlier this week.  Better now, thank you.  We are all just doing the best we can.  And yes, maybe the planets are out of alignment this week.  That would explain a number of things for me!   

Charlotte Mason would say that as a parent you need to lay a feast before your children and if so, they will end up being well-rounded educated individuals.  The trick for me is getting the feast on the table.  !!!  I am working on that. 

I know what I want for my kids.  I am NOT positive how I am going to get there or IF I will get there.  But for me, HSing sure beats having my kids follow someone else’s ideas of what it means to be educated.

End of rant.  

Lucy