The Mindful Homeschool

Well, let’s just say I am not a technophile, if there is such a word.  I was pretty happy with life before computers and Windows and email and all that stuff came into “vogue”.  And it took a while before I was able to understand how truly wonderful the internet is.   So forgive me if it takes me awhile to get this blog looking good.  I apologize.  It (computer stuff) does not come naturally to me.  With that said, I want to let everyone know that although I am reading Meditations from the Mat (and I HIGHLY recommend it) that is not what my kids are reading.  (Although last night H-man did take a look at the book and laughed at the photos of people in yoga poses.) 

We are reading lots of different things.  Pippi Longstocking, Mrs. Piggle Wiggle, the D’aulaire books on Benjamin Franklin, Buffalo Bill, Abraham Lincoln and George Washington and Minn of the Mississippi by Holling.  Celia continues to read all sorts of books about fairies in her spare time.

The kids have been playing in the cul de sac by our house a lot lately.  There is a huge pile of snow that they have dug out and made into dens, for lack of a better word.  They are having a ton of fun every day doing this and they spend a lot of time with the neighbor kids working on it together.  This afternoon they are outside taking down icicles by the house and collecting them in a sled for a future use.  Hmmm.  Maybe I need to check on that.

Anyway, I just wanted to clarify that we are doing more than reading daily meditations.  And I will work on getting my blog looking better when I get some free time.  I am really working on practicing yoga daily, meditating, staying in the moment, staying healthy and trying to put together a routine that incorporates a lot of the Charlotte Mason ideas.  Buying healthy food, cooking, cleaning, reading and fostering a learning atmosphere leaves me with little extra time.  Plus, having a three year old in the house and all the clean up and laundry that goes with it makes for a busy day.  I know I need to make a list of what I really want out of this year, this life and spend my time accordingly.  But it is SO much easier said than done.  So with that in my mind, I shall sign off and do a few stretches, maybe write in my journal and hopefully clear my mind.  

Namaste!  

We finished reading The Little Prince tonight.   I had read it a long time ago but had forgotten how it had ended.  I had a hard time reading out loud tonight because the ending is so sad.  I think W found it to be really sad too.  He kept rubbing his eyes and I don’t think it was because he was sleepy (although he probably was tired after a full day of snowboarding with his dad).  C had read it on her own a few weeks ago and hadn’t really understood what had happened to The Little Prince at the end. 

I am left with a lot of questions myself.  I googled for more information on the novella but I have yet to find any good answers to my questions.  It turns out that The Little Prince is one of the top 50 most popular books in the world.  I believe it was #26.  I have memorized one of the lines from the book:

“It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” 

We read more chapters from The Little Prince tonight and we came upon this gem.  The little prince learns this from the fox he has “tamed”:

“It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.”

W had a playdate with a neighborhood friend.  C started working on a latch hook rug and H, Papa and I made brownie biscotti.  I made it to my yoga class and hope to take another class tomorrow.  We watched the Grammy Awards on TV.  Oh, and lest I forget, I heard a great poem on the Writer’s Almanac on NPR while washing the supper dishes.  All in all, a pretty good day.

We found some more great books to read today.  I finally read the book, Zen Shorts, by Jon  J. Muth.  It’s a wonderful children’s book filled with short little Zen stories.  I had read about it on someone’s blog the other day and had to get it from the library and I am so glad I did.  It deals with sharing, good luck and bad luck, and anger among other things.  I cannot do it justice by trying to describe it so I will stop and say, “Just check it out.  I think you will like it.”

Then tonight we played the concentration/memory game again with Le Petit Prince cards.  I mentioned something about the book from which the illustrations came.  C said she didn’t know there was a book.  ???  So then I had to find my old, used copy that I bought used at some garage sale somewhere a long time ago and started reading it to the kids.  It was so delightful and the kids seemed to get it.  I had read the book before but I am pretty sure I did not enjoy it as much as I did tonight.  The book is funny, sweet and very touching.  Once again, I cannot do it justice by telling you about it.  Just get it and read it!  I read the first 5 chapters or so and will continue reading tomorrow.

The kids and parents are tired after a day of swimming at cousin T’s birthday party.  It will be an early one tonight.  Zzzzzz…

Today was another day of Harry Potter’s The Goblet of Fire, art, hanging out with friends and playing games.  A typical unschool day.

The older kids spent the morning hanging out in the bedroom listening to and reading the fourth book in the Harry Potter series.  H-man spent some quality time in the bathtub preparing himself for swimming himself silly at his cousin T’s birthday pool party tomorrow.

After lunch we drove C to her art class where she learned all about Alexander Calder, an artist who was known for his mobiles and stabiles.  C and the other children in the class made sculptures out of wire and colorful shapes.  C’s finished work was a bird perched under a wired arch.  (Note to self:  Must take photos.)  The teacher complimented C on her work and said that she worked well independently.  This art class has been a lot of fun for C, not only because she gets to hang out with one of her best friends, but because she is loving all the art she is doing. 

Two weeks ago, when she took her first art class with our homeschool group, she came home with wonderful, creative pictures that were similar to the type of paintings Marc Chagall is famous for.  For that class they used an oil pastel/mixed media drawing to achieve the right effect.  Each week the children study a particular artist and then do art in that particular artist’s style.  It has been a great way to end the week and learn something more about art.

After class, we went with our HS friends to a local coffee shop where we had something to drink and saw…more art!  The coffee shop was opening a store that specialized in earthy, local art.  It was a beautiful gallery and we were all oohing and ahhing and saying at the same time, “I love this place!”

When we got home the older kids went back to their Harry Potter reading.  W is determined to read/listen to the fourth book and not be outread by his sister.  She finished reading the book yesterday, the same day we picked it up from the library, but is now attempting a second read.

Papa John picked up a new tent for H-man which he enjoyed immensely.  It is now set up in our living room and is a cozy place for the kids and adults (although not all at the same time, silly!)  It fits about 2 people comfortably but you could fit more in if you really wanted to!

Later this evening the children and Papa watched a PBS special about parrots in Austrailia and then watched a show on the Parthenon in Greece.  Even W didn’t want to step away from the TV and miss the show.  The night ended with C, W and Papa playing an exciting game of concentration with Le Petit Prince cards, a gift from Aunt L.  C won, narrowly beating her brother.  She hadn’t played this game in such a long time and it was nice to see everyone having so much fun with it. 

This week we had to take our vacuum cleaner in for a repair.  I dreaded the idea of taking a whole morning or two of my time to load up the three kids in sub-zero temps and drive to and from the vacuum cleaner store, a good 20-25 minute drive each way.  But if there is one thing I know about myself, it is that I love my vacuuming and I cannot do without it!  

So on Monday, I decided to combine the trip to the vacuum cleaner place with a trip to the MOA where we were able to hang out at our favorite Lego store, make Lego cars and check out the latest merchandise.  That worked out okay because I had been promising them a trip to the Lego store for over a week. 

And today, I had to pick up the vacuum cleaner which involved another 50 minute round-trip drive to the same store/repair center.  But this time we brought Harry Potter along!  My dd suggested that we pick up the book and audio-tapes (which were waiting for us on the library reserves shelves) before we drove across town.  That way we would be able to listen to the beginning of The Goblet of Fire in the mini-van while we accomplished our errands.  This worked out great and I couldn’t help feeling proud that I was “home-schooling” while driving.  Such efficiency! 

It is moments like these when I think that HSing is so doable and people just don’t realize it.  It is possible to do all that you need to do to keep the household running fairly smoothly while learning.  The curriculum doesn’t have to come out of a box and the learning doesn’t need to take place sitting at a desk.  This type of learning leans itself toward what one might call child-centered learning and un-schooling but who is to say it is not as effective if not more effective than traditional schooling methods.

The children are regularly sharing with me what they have learned from these HP books and there is a genuine and whole-hearted desire to read and learn more.  Sounds like pure, unadulterated learning to me!  Now if I could just learn a few spells to make that vacuum cleaner zoom through the house and make my house look nice and tidy! 

These are the three words I keep trying to repeat to myself today:  Sovereignity, empathy, and acceptance.  You see, I am reading Myla and Jon Kabat-Zinn’s Everyday Blessings: The Inner Work of Mindful Parenting once again.  It is a book that takes time to read.  It takes time to absorb all the wisdom within it.  I had read parts of it before but like a lot of other books that I borrow from the library, I had to return it before I could finish reading all of it.  And I really need to read this book now.

Here is a nugget from one of the chapters in the book entitled “Acceptance”:

“As we learn to observe and accept our own wide range of feelings, including very turbulent ones, as part of our effort to be mindful, we naturally become more aware of other people’s feelings, especially our children’s.  We come to know something of the landscape of feelings and their changing nature, and are more likely to be sympathetic and less likely, at the same time, to take them personally.  We are better able to accept their experience and their feelings, even if we may not like how they are behaving.  In doing so, we are able to step out of the limited realm in which we as parents can often find ourselves, where we are so carried away by our own feelings and our attachment to our view of things that we cut ourselves off from our children and in some deep way, without realizing or intending to, abandon them.”

Practicing acceptance is a crucial component of mindful parenting, according to the authors.  Seeing and accepting things as they are, no matter how we feel about it.  

I find parenting to be so demanding and time-consuming and it is so overwhelming at times.  I find that there are times when my patience is lacking, my temper is short and I just need to be by myself.  Is that such a bad thing?  I love my kids but I need the time away to get a fresh perspective.   

It is when I am overwhelmed, exhausted and feeling spent that I am my worst self.  When I am able to step back and look at things from outside my cluttered head, I am able to regain a sense of calm and peace that is otherwise missing.  Maybe, practicing acceptance of my own feelings and behavior will allow me to accept my children’s feelings and behavior more easily.

And there are things my kids do that are really hard for me to accept.  The things they do (or don’t do) can drive me batty.  It can bring out the worst in me.  Accepting these things does not mean they can keep doing these things over and over without any intervening on my part.  But accepting the reality of it all could be the first step toward achieving more harmony in the household.  Not ignoring it and hoping it will go away. 

Of course, there are some things that I can just accept and let go of.  Things like the pen marks on the wall and the all-day pajama marathons.  Some things just aren’t that important to me.  Sure, I wish my toddler hadn’t drawn on the newly painted walls and colored on the bottom of our beautiful cherry wood dining table.  But eventually the walls will get painted over and no one but my family will probably ever see the underside of my dining room table.  And when we do look at the crayon marks under the table it will probably be with a sense of wistful nostalgia and remembrance of my 3 yo’s energy and creativity (for lack of a better word, lol).  If I wanted a perfectly decorated house, I wouldn’t have gotten married and had kids anyway.  Some things are fairly easy for me to accept and to let go.  

Other things are not as easy.  Some behavior requires my attention and problem-solving skills and starts to consume me if I am not careful.  This also requires a certain acceptance and letting go.  It is not good to ignore it and just sweep it under the rug but it also not healthy for me to allow it to cloud over my thinking and overtake me.    

So this week, when I take a little bit of time for myself,  I may be chanting my new mantra, ”Sovereignity, empathy and acceptance.”  And in doing so, I hope to cultivate more awareness of what my children really need from me, what I can let go of, and what I can do to help them grow up healthy and strong.

Yesterday was a good day spent reading poems to H-man in the morning and later, visiting friends at their new home.  H-man and the other kids have been found jumping on the big bed which I am not too keen on.  I know they need an outlet for their pent-up energy and we have been experiencing a lot of time indoors due to the sub-zero temps outside.  So, a couple days ago, I told H-man I will have to read him from the book, Jump-On-The-Bed Poems.  He sounded very intrigued. 

Yesterday I pulled it out and read it to him.  It’s a great book called You Be Good & I’ll Be Night; Jump-on-the Bed Poems by Eve Merriam.  He seemed to really enjoy it.  It has a lot of really wonderful poems about things kids can relate to, like releasing your pet fish into the river and hoping that he makes it to the ocean to swim free with others of his kind!

Here’s the hard part of the day.  Getting out of the house and into the van so we could drive over to our friends’ house.  It took about 45 minutes longer than I thought it would.  I am not sure why.  I had to change a stinky diaper and dress the 3 yo.   And getting out of my friend’s house took another extra 45 minutes, partly due to the fact that we were gabbing while trying to round up the kids and get jackets, boots, and mittens on.  And partly due to the fact that H-man, my 3 yo, lay down on the floor, sobbing that he didn’t want to leave.  Poor guy.  He really loves a good social outing and has a hard time with good-byes. 

We had a lot of fun; my three kids played with my friend’s three kids and everyone had a playmate.  And best of all, the moms got to gab with few interruptions.  It would be nice to have get-togethers like that more often! 

Today started out with me reading There’s A Batwing In My Lunchbox by Ann Hodgman.  My 7 yo son has really taken an interest in this book even though I am sure it will not land on the Charlotte Mason lists for recommended reading.  Nonetheless, it was a very (unexpectedly) entertaining read for me, W and my 9 yo dd.  We finished the book tonight amidst a lot of jumping and running.  H, our energetic 3 yo, was dressed in a cape (courtesy of his elder siblings) and he ran around the house tonight saying he was Super Why from the PBS series of the same name.  H loves this show.  He calls it his show.  It teaches kids to read and even the older kids seem to enjoy it although they (esp. W) would not admit that.  H wanted us to read him The Lady With The Alligator Purse for his bedtime reading.  W started to read the first page to him, then told us he didn’t want to read it in front of all of us.  W seems to be progressing in his reading abilities but seems to lack the confidence to read much on his own.  It is usually a “forced” subject.  I hope that changes in time.  I know that he really likes to be read to; he really can follow a storyline.  That, I think, is more important than skill at this point in his education.  I want all of my children to have a real love of books and so far, I have yet to be discouraged.  

Harry Potter was being read over the past few weeks.  C and W read the first 3 books in order.  W listened to them on audio CD/or tape.  He erased some of the window markers that C had applied to our bathroom mirror at Christmas time and replaced “I (heart symbol) Henry” with “I (heart symbol) HP”  At first I wasn’t sure what it meant or who wrote it but then it dawned on me.  W really liked the books.  Unfortunately, watching the video of the first HP movie seemed to fuel some nightmares so we are going to give the whole HP series a rest for the time being.

Yesterday the boys put on shorts and their MN Twins t-shirts (gifts from TCF last summer) and played catch in the living room.  It was fun, even for mom, and it took our mind off the fact that it is very cold outside these days.  All three kids also spent some time sledding down the hill in the backyard.  We have had new snow to cover some of the bare patches in the back, thankfully. 

Today it was skateboarding.  Papa John (i.e.  Daddy) let the boys do some tricks on the skateboard in the lower level.  It didn’t seem to matter too much that the floor was carpeted.  Fun, regardless of the conditions!

C spent a good portion of the day reading and building on the Lego extravaganza she and W have in the bedroom.  We need to take a photo of it and record it.

Triton, our betta friend, got some clean water to swim in today.  It was looking pretty cloudy.  It made me realize that I need to come up with a schedule for all the work that needs to be done in a given day/week/month.  There is so much to do that we need to come up with a better plan to get it all done.  So that is one of my goals for the month - to get more organized.  Yeah, I know.  It has been a goal of mine for a long time.  

Hopefully, we can figure out what has been fatiguing C these past couple of years and get everyone back on some sort of a schedule.  It seems like the new non-dairy diet has made her a much happier, more even-keeled, more energetic girl.  If eliminating dairy can do all that for her, it is more than worth the effort.  It has been a bit of a shift to switch from our dairy-laden diet to a diet high in meat but like I said, it seems to be working.  I plan to incorporate more fish and legumes into the diet as well.  Heck, I would go vegan if I could.  That could be something to work toward.  C told me last night before she fell asleep that she feels happier on this non-dairy diet.  That is definitely a good thing.